Richness Protection
by Quinis
Summary: There's a threat to Bruce Wayne's life so, Superman dispatches the Team (minus Robin) to protect him. Bruce is not happy. The Team is not happy. It's time for the 'Brucie' act.
1. Chapter 1

**Richness Protection**

* * *

**Prompt: Where are all the billionaire playboys?!**

_repost from part two_

_This meme lacks Brucie!Bruce. We have to change that._  
_Prompt: There is some sort of terrorist warning/whatever and the League assigns Young Justice as bodyguards for an unwilling "Bruce Wayne". Cue Bruce being stubborn and uncorporative because nobody asked him. He's playing extra dumb, starts vanishing at random times ("I accidently locked myself in the toilet"; "I got lost in my own building"; "I had to sex up some random non-existent girl." - all canon excuses! ;)), trying to stop the threat on his own and being a pest in general. Hilarity ensues!_

_Identity revealing or shipping is open to the filler!_

**Notes:** Another prompt fic. I haven't seen much 'Brucie' but, I'm going to give it a go.

* * *

**Part 1 – "_I guess I only rank sidekick protection, huh?"_**

* * *

Superman stood where Batman usually stood. He looked over the team, his eyes skipping over Superboy. He ignored all questions about where Batman and Robin were as he pulled up a picture of a black haired man in a suit. He was well-built with broad shoulders but the woman with dark and cropped hair hanging off his arm like she owned him suggested that he was a pushover.

Two members of the team recognised the person but only one spurt out his name;

"What possible interest could the Justice League have in _Bruce Wayne_?" Artemis demanded to know.

Superman hesitated and Kid Flash realised that whatever he was doing here, Batman didn't know about it.

"This never leaves this room but, Bruce Wayne secretly funds the Justice League. So, when there are threats to his life, we feel the need to intervene.

"Wayne is holding a Gala Ball in Metropolis tomorrow. You will be there are his personal guard and as extra security."

"Does Mr. Wayne know about this?" Miss Martian questioned, raising a tentative hand.

"He will." But Superman was confident that he wouldn't know until the team turned up on his doorstep. They didn't need Batman out there, pulling crazy stunts, risking himself and his secret when they had the team.

* * *

Alfred opened the door to five teenagers in spandex. Unruffled, he summoned Bruce.

"Hello, Mr. Wayne," Aqualad greeted him, leader and chosen spokesperson of the team, "we have been contracted by the Justice League to protect you tonight during your Gala tonight."

Bruce unclenched his gritted teeth and welcomed the team in with a smile. Internally, he sent many curses Superman's way and vowed to place kryptonite in the Watchtower.

This wouldn't have happened in Gotham. He regretted bending to the whims of his company board and agreeing to hold the latest Wayne Gala in Metropolis.

"Well, come in kids!" he said, holding his hands wide for them. "So, your bosses sent you to watch me, did they?" He chuckled, seeing the annoyed and enraged faces on the team. He was pressing every button he could. "I guess I only rank sidekick protection, huh? Maybe I should rethink my next donation?"

"The Justice League are not your personal protectors!" Superboy was the first to crack and Aqualad held his hand out to still the angry super. Bruce watched the expressions dance on their faces, the twitches of eyes and lips that showed they were using Miss Martian's powers to communicate without speech.

"You know," Bruce said, as if he hadn't heard Superboy or noticed the silent communication, "Dickie's about your age. He can show you around while I make a phone call. Dickie!" His summon rose and fell in tone and volume. It sounded more like summoning a servant while drunk than calling a son.

It would also alert Dick to the situation. One where their identities may be at risk.

Dick made his approach loud with feet pounding on the floor. He opened the door to his room in the suite and called out an annoyed;

"What?"

"Get over here! We have guests!" Bruce called back jovially. "They're baby heroes, like that... uh... big blue here who cost me a limo that one time."

Dick dashed and jumped over the couch in the middle of the room, landing right before them and walking over to Bruce's side with a wide smile. His blue eyes sparkled as he looked them over.

"Hi! I'm Richard Grayson, call me Dick," he said. His gaze paused on Artemis, making her sweat. They knew each other from school but she didn't know that he knew that. She was worried about being exposed. "Don't mind Bruce, here. He just woke up like half-an-hour ago."

Bruce yawned, bringing a hand over his mouth.

"Show them around, Dick," he said, "while I go make a phone call."

Dick nodded and Bruce left. The team had no idea what to expect from this kid. He was dressed in a simple blue shirt with jeans but they were obviously of the finest quality.

"So," Dick hummed, "I've heard of Kid Flash, Aqualad and Superboy, it's a little late but nice job with that bus, but I don't think I've heard of the rest of you."

Miss Martian took that as signal and jumped forward, grabbing his hand and shaking it.

"Nice to meet you! I'm Miss Martian."

"_Enchanté_," he responded, bowing over her hand. "Pleased to meet you." He smiled up at her, his blue eyes intent on her features.

Miss Martian pulled back, a blush appearing on her features as Kid Flash glared at him. Dick smiled back, tilting his head innocently.

"I'm Artemis," the blond archer grunted, crossing her arms so he couldn't reach her hands.

"Artemis," Dick smiled and nodded. He turned to Miss Martian. "And Miss Martian. I guess you'll be protecting Bruce tonight?"

The team nodded.

"I'll show you around. This is the best suite in the hotel!"

In a whisper, Miss Martian asked Artemis what a 'suite' was.

"A large hotel room for rich people," Artemis muttered quietly back as Dick showed them the large TV built into the room and the artwork on the walls.

* * *

Meanwhile, Bruce was sitting in the Master Bedroom with the door locked and his phone in his hand.

"I'm going to kill you, Clark," he growled.

"Relax, Bruce," the easy-going reporter said cheerily from the other end of the line, "you're always saying how we need to challenge the team. Well, now they're challenged."

Oh, they'd be challenged alright. Bruce vowed that.

"And you should be taking this threat more seriously. It is the League of Assassins after all."

Bruce remained silent. He didn't even bother to correct the klutz. It wasn't Ra's, head of the League, after him but his daughter, Talia.

"You are risking not only my identity, but Dick's as well," Bruce growled out.

"Look. Relax. Enjoy the Gala and let us handle it."

Clark hung up. Bruce resisted the urge to snap his phone in two or toss it at the wall. Because they were staying in a hotel, his Batsuit was over in the Wayne Tech office.

He needed to find a way to get there, collect his suit and then get Talia to back down without the team realising what was happening.

Dick kept one eye on the movie playing on the TV and one eye on Bruce's door. He knew that something was up, after all, Bruce had requested that he stay here with Alfred while Batman goes out. The Team's appearance was probably going to change that plan.

Dick wondered what Superman was thinking. The words they exchanged had painted the local hero as the reason behind this.

The door finally opened and Dick didn't react, pretending to be absorbed in the movie.

"Ah, what are you all watching?" Bruce asked in a detached but polite manner.

"Dick turned it on," Artemis was quick to say. They were not watching the movie, they were on the job!

"'Up'," Kid Flash responded. "It's about a man whose dreamed of adventure with his wife and when she dies he decides to chase the dream in order to remember her. There's also a boy scout kid and a bunch of talking dogs."

Artemis nudged him painfully in the side.

"Huh. Well, enjoy your movie," Bruce said.

_[We're on the job!]_ she reminded him through the mental link.

_[So? He asked.]_

_[Not now,]_ Aqualad interrupted to halt the fight before it escalated. Out loud, he said to Bruce, "where are you going?"

Bruce internally cursed. It really couldn't be that easy, _could it_? He wondered if he should have tried to sneak out even as he turned to face the teenagers.

Dick smirked at him and he was going to have words with that boy. He should be helping, not enjoying the show.

"Ah, well. A, ah-hem, lady friend of mine forgot something in my office yesterday. I need to go pick it up for her."

"We will come with you," Aqualad said.

"What about you, Dickie? You coming too?" Bruce asked, silently hoping for his protege to make this hard on the team.

Dick did a brilliant act of a bored rich kid. He turned his nose up.

"No way." And he settled back into the couch. Both he and Bruce watched as the team exchanged looks.

_[Artemis, Superboy and Miss Martian, you go with Mr. Wayne. Kid Flash and I will stay with Richard.]_

_[He prefers to be called Dick,]_ Kid Flash commented as Artemis relayed to Bruce that three of them would go with him.

"Fantastic," Bruce muttered under his breath, his smile almost Joker-wide.


	2. 2 -I got lost in my own building

**Part 2 – _"I got lost in my own building."_**

* * *

Everything went fine until they entered the building. Artemis looked around the reception area and then turned back to where Bruce Wayne should have been standing.

"Where'd he go?" Superboy questioned, noticing a moment after her.

"I will search for his mind," Miss Martian said, closing her eyes. It was easier to ignore the strange looks in her direction that way.

Artemis just huffed and decided to grill the receptionist. First, she asked if they saw where Bruce Wayne went. Nothing. Then she asked if they could be escorted to his office.

"Well?" Superboy asked Miss Martian when she opened her eyes. She shook her head.

"I can't sense him," she admitted, confusion in her tone. It wasn't like this was a dense area, she should have been able to find a specific person with little trouble.

"No, I do not have a meeting with him," Artemis growled, her voice rising. Both Miss Martian and Superboy stared at her. The archer looked moments away from impaling the stone-faced receptionist.

"We should stop her," Miss Martian commented. Superboy nodded and walked over, apologised for Artemis and herded her back over to the door.

"This is ridiculous!" Artemis complained.

"We need a plan," Superboy pointed out.

"If Robin was here, we could get him to hack the security or something," Miss Martian sighed.

"Well, he's not," Artemis responded, jealous that the little hacker seemed to get a free pass on this annoyance of a mission. "M'gann, can you get up to Mr. Wayne's office? Go intangible or something and sneak up, see if he's up there?"

_[Hello, Megan! Of course! I can do that,]_ Miss Martian admitted, going invisible. She flew up and tried to find her way to wherever it was Mr. Wayne worked in this building. She followed the fire escape route maps to a large office.

A large office with Bruce Wayne's name on the door.

'Found it!' she thought to herself, floating in. It seemed empty and she made herself visible and tangible again.

"Well, that's pretty cool." She jumped at the sound of Bruce's voice. The man was standing behind her, his back to the door with a suitcase in one hand and a black lacy bra in the other.

Miss Martian flushed. She knew what a bra was and had an idea of the sequence of events which would lead to a man having possession of one.

"Um… that…" she mumbled.

Bruce laughed, holding the lacy thing up for her to see.

"Yeah, nice isn't it? The lady of this port has fine taste." He raise an eyebrow at the frozen Martian. "I'll meet you back at the entrance then?"

She nodded and vanished.

Once he was certain she was gone, Bruce turned on the screen of his computer. He had been using it to see if he could track Talia down in the confines of Metropolis.

* * *

Artemis paced back and forth, irritated and annoyed. Miss Martian had returned ten minutes ago, flushed and muttering something about Mr. Wayne and 'lady friends'. Artemis found herself in the ridiculous position of having to explain what 'lady of this port' and about Bruce Wayne and his many girlfriends.

Miss Martian didn't seem to understand why he needed more than one, after all, she believed that girlfriends and boyfriends were exclusive.

At this point, she was willing to believe that Mr. Wayne had been kidnapped.

"Ah, thanks for waiting, kids!" he called, stepping out of the elevator with a smile on his face.

"Where have you been?" Artemis demanded to know, hands on her hips and feeling a lot like her mother.

"I got lost in my own building," Bruce said as way of explanation with a smile and a shrug.

* * *

Bruce used changing into the navy suit for the gala as an excuse to speak freely with Dick. They stood side-by-side in the master bedroom while Alfred did up their ties.

"Talia's coming tonight?" Dick questioned.

"She's not hiding," Bruce pointed out as Talia had registered as 'Head, T', the name she had used when they first started dating. "And I don't feel comfortable with you going. Not with the threat on my life and Talia's assassins being there."

"I can handle a few ninja assassins," Dick responded.

"Finished. Do not undo my work, sir," Alfred said to Bruce. Dick tilted his head up as Alfred knelt down to do up his tie.

Bruce's hand automatically went for the noose around his neck but Alfred shot him a look. Bruce sighed and dropped his hand. This was going to be an uncomfortable night; in more ways than one.

"Can you handle ninja assassins while the team is watching?" Bruce asked. They needed to always be aware of the risk to their identities.

"I'll work something out," Dick responded. Kid Flash knew who he was so he figured his friend would cover for him in an emergency.

There was a knock at the door and the scarlet speedster in question popped inside.

"Ready to go yet?" he asked, fidgeting.

"Kid Flash, I'll be counting on you to watch after Dick," Bruce said to him, in a moment of seriousness.

"Yes, sir!" Kid Flash responded, amazed that he had be tasked with protecting his friend. That Batman, well Bruce, trusted him to look after Dick made him feel capable.

"I can look after myself," Dick frowned.

"As can I," Bruce responded, adjusting his jacket. "Let's go, can't leave our bodyguards waiting."

* * *

Artemis was quiet and looking everywhere but at Dick and Bruce, but mostly avoiding Dick. The team had managed to squeeze into the limo with Miss Martian flying above the vehicle in camouflage and Kaldur and Superboy having left earlier to check out the venue.

"You're Artemis, right?" Dick said, smiling as Artemis hid a flinch. He had been planning to leave their identities alone but, she was making it too easy to mess with her.

"That's right," she responded defensively.

"You know, I know a girl called Artemis. We go to school together." He paused for dramatic effect and started patting his pockets. "I have a picture on my phone-"

"Dick," Bruce stated. A warning. The poor archer was close to hyperventilating. Or shooting him with an arrow. "Artemis works with the male green archer."

"In Star City?" Dick questioned innocently, looking over to Artemis for confirmation.

Artemis nodded, letting out a little bit of tension.

"Oh," Dick slumped and put a disappointed tone in his voice. It wasn't hard, he just drew on his feelings of not being able to tell the team who he was. "Gee, I guess that makes sense. You wouldn't use your real name as a hero name."

"Of course not!" Her smile was a bit too wide and her eyes were darting away from him every few moments.

Someone needed to teach this girl to lie in a high stress environment. Or maybe she just wasn't comfortable sitting next to Kid Flash. Who was snickering and not helping the situation at all.

"We're here," Bruce said as the car stopped in front of the hall. There were ropes set up, keeping the reporters and star chasers away from those entering.

Kid Flash was the only one who could think of something to say;

"Whoa."

"It's the who's who of Gotham and some of Metropolis," Dick explained excitedly.

"Too bad Lex Luthor isn't coming," Bruce lamented. He meant it. Meeting with Lex would not only be a good chance to gather information but also a way to keep an eye on the corrupt businessman. Also would annoy Superman who insisted that Luthor was his problem.

Kid Flash and Artemis exchanged looks.

"Isn't he a bad guy?" Kid Flash whispered to her before being shushed.

"Ready?" Bruce asked them and they resisted the urge to cower. For a moment, it looked like he was leading them to a slaughter.

* * *

"What's wrong with you two?" Superboy later asked obliviously.

Kid Flash and Artemis were pale and sweating.

"It was loud," Artemis said, "and I'm never doing that again."

Kid Flash nodded in agreement. Superboy had no idea what they were talking about.

* * *

"MR. WAYNE! MR. WAYNE! WHO'S THE LOVELY LADY YOU'RE HIDING FROM US?"

"YOU WERE CAUGHT AT A BOUTIQUE ON-"

The Gotham reporters surged forward, bellowing questions on the off chance he might answer them.

"IS THAT KID FLASH? WHAT'S KID FLASH DOING HERE? MR. WAYNE, CAN YOU EXPLAIN?"

"RICHARD! WHAT DO YOU THINK OF 'S NEW GIRLFRIEND?"

"RICHARD! ANY COMMENT'S ON GOTHAM ACADEMY'S RECENT REFURBISHMENT? WERE STUDENTS REALLY BEHIND THE DESTRUCTION THAT TOOK PLACE?"

"WHO'S THE BLOND? KID FLASH'S GIRLFRIEND?"

"We're not together!" Kid Flash and Artemis bellowed in sync. Unfortunately, the reporters didn't accept that. They started with rebuttals, shouting statements and more questions. Not matter what they said, it didn't stop.

Kid Flash bolted for the door.

As Artemis followed Kid Flash inside, she was certain Bruce Wayne was laughing at them.

"Come on!" she motioned to the man.

"Sorry!" Bruce said to the reporters with a wide smile. "I've got extra security tonight and it looks like they want me inside."

"Plus his date is already inside!" Dick added with a similar smirk.


	3. 3 - I accidentally locked myself

**Part 3 – "I accidentally locked myself in the toilet."**

* * *

The woman from the photo Superman showed them waltzed over the moment Bruce came through the door. Her short dark hair featured a sparkling gem flower which matched her slim purple and dark blue dress. Part of her leg was visible, displaying glass-like purple heels.

"Bruce, you are late," she purred, latching herself onto his arm.

"I know," he responded back with a smile. For just a moment, his gaze sharpened as he looked over the hall, identifying the ways in and out.

"Hello, Selina," Dick greeted politely. He might not know whether he could trust Catwoman but Selina was alright. Besides, he could see that she and Bruce had a thing for each other.

"Hello, Dick, how's school?" Selina asked.

"Great! There's a new girl and I got a picture of her on her first day. She's a Wayne Foundation student."

"Ah, one less rich snob in your school day then?" Dick smirked and his eyes twinkled, an unspoken yes. "And how about your grades?"

Dick's smile instantly faded. Artemis, who had been watching in the background with her heart thudding, snickered.

"Really?" he said, almost in a whine. "Bruce's other dates don't ask about my grades."

"Then they're missing out. Because if you don't want to tell me about your grades then you can spend tonight studying before bed." Selina leant closer to Bruce and smiled up at her date. "And I can have Bruce all to myself."

Dick glared. But he couldn't say anything back. Most of his comebacks had to do with Batman and Robin and Superboy was standing by the back exit in super-hearing range.

Bruce let out a chuckle at Dick's indignant expression.

"Go check out the food," he said to him, "I think I spotted Kid Flash by the table."

"Fine." Dick rolled his eyes and made his way over to the table. Bruce was correct, Kid Flash was there, stuffing his face faster than the naked eye could see.

"Our cover is that our mentors are donating and sent us so they could spend the night fighting crime," Kid Flash informed him, "or something like that."

"Too bad Batman couldn't 'donate'," Dick grumbled, tugging at his tie. He was careful not to undo Alfred's hard work but he hated the feeling of the tie around his neck.

Kid Flash paused for a moment, his eyes loosing focus.

"Miss Martian says she's spotted some people in the shadows outside," he explained.

"You going to go handle them?" Dick asked sadly. He wanted to fight too and a quick glance over the hall informed him that Bruce had disappeared.

"I'm supposed to stay with you," Kid Flash said. "Just because the hit's on Bruce, doesn't mean they won't overlook using you to get to him."

"Really?" Dick responded, knowing that Kid Flash would have suggested that. It wasn't the kind of strategy the team usually employed. Common sense dictated that Dick would be safe in the hall because he was surrounded by people.

* * *

Superboy looked through the sea of people. He couldn't see Bruce Wayne anywhere.

_[He's gone,]_ he sent through the link, his mental voice tight. He had the Gotham socialite in his view just moments ago. Then someone stepped in the way and the man was gone.

Outside, Miss Martian was floating up behind the people in the shadows. Their clothes were like that of the ninjas that Kid Flash had shown her pictures of once. Just wearing reddish-brown instead of black.

_[They have weapons,]_ she said, noticing the glint of swords tucked either into a sheath on their back or into their waistband.

_[Miss Martian and I will take care of the ninjas. Superboy, Artemis and Kid Flash find Mr. Wayne,]_ Aqualad instructed_, [we cannot let them find him before we do.]_

_[I'll stay with Dick!]_ Kid Flash input,_ [just in case they come after him as well.]_

_[Very well.]_

Aqualad quickly rounded the corner were Miss Martian was hovering, his water-bearers in his hands and ready to go.

They attacked the ninjas. The ninjas drew their swords. Before the swords could make contact with the two heroes, two dark things streaked out of the darkness and made contact with the ninjas' hands, knocking the swords out and giving them an opening.

Miss Martian tied the two ninjas up while Aqualad retrieved the weapons from the ground.

"These are Batman's," he said.

"Batman is here?" Miss Martian questioned in surprise. She sounded pleased but she wasn't certain if she should be. She quickly sent the message over the link.

_[Great. Maybe Batman can find Wayne!]_ Artemis sent back in a huff.

_[I see him,]_ Superboy sent back.

* * *

Superboy walked over to the bulky man in the suit. It looked different, ruffled.

"You can't disappear like Robin," he said to the man, his hands pressed to his hips. Bruce found himself cataloguing the similarities between the clone and Clark. That pose was what he liked to refer to as 'prideful super'. "We're supposed to protect you."

"I accidentally locked myself in the toilet," Bruce explained sheepishly, tugging his tie tight. Alfred wasn't going to be happy but it was a little late to think about that.

"Have you seen Selina?" he asked Superboy, glancing around like he had no idea what was going on.

_[Who's Selina?]_ Superboy mentally asked the rest of the team.

_[Woman from the photo and Bru- uh, Mr. Wayne's date,]_ Kid Flash responded.

_[Oh.]_ Superboy looked around but couldn't see her.

"Don't worry, I'm sure I can find another," Bruce said, moving back into the crowd. He stopped to greet a few prominent business people attending and then wandered over to the stairs.

_[What did he mean by that?]_ Superboy sent over the link, baffled and enraged. _[Do I want to know what he means by that?]_

Bruce cursed. Because there was Artemis, standing by the stairs and waving at him.

"Seems like they get younger every year, huh, Brucie?" an investor commented from his side. Bruce knew he was a sleaze, about to lose his job for sexual harassment and cheating on his wife with a hooker. Batman might have to look further into his history and make sure there's no one younger in the list of his victims.

"Sure do," he responded cheerfully instead. "But she'd probably take your eye out with those arrows she carries!" He laughed as if it was a joke and the man laughed with him. "I prefer my women to be women... and on the cover of a few magazines."

"Well, not all of us can get the beauties."

_[Ugh. How long until this party is over?]_ Artemis commented.

_[Not long now,]_ Aqualad said. As if to prove him right, a man in a dark suit and yellow tie stepped up onto the makeshift stage.

"Good evening everyone!" he said into the microphone. He scanned the crowd, spotting Bruce standing near one of the waiters with a wine glass in his hand.

Bruce gave him a smile and thumbs up.

"We're going to have the presentations outside in the garden this year so, if you could all move out, thank you!"

_[Uh-oh,] _Kid Flash commented as the sea of people swallowed up Bruce Wayne's figure. He turned to where Dick had been standing a moment ago.

He was gone.

_[I lost Dick!]_

_[Yeah, and we lost Wayne,] _Artemis added.

_[He's huge. How can such a huge guy just vanish?]_ Superboy queried.

_[Batman can,]_ Miss Martian pointed out.

_[Yeah, but Batman's Batman. Bruce Wayne's just a rich fool who seems to have no concept of how his life is in danger,]_ Artemis commented.

_[Team. Argue later. Find Wayne and his son, before the assassins do,]_ Aqualad ordered.

* * *

Dick moved through the crowd with ease. It was nothing compared to a crowded day at the circus. Besides, he had his target in sight. Dick pulled out his mini bolas; a three balled weapon connected by knot and a rope, from a secret compartment in his belt.

He spotted brown skin with black heeled boots and was glad that Talia exuded an aura that made most people part when she moved. An expert toss and the bolas wrapped around her legs, sending her crashing to the ground.

A few people moved to help her, she shooed them away. It was shameful for an Al Ghul to fall, even when hit by a weapon.

The hall was almost empty. She could still make this work.

"Now!" she cried out, her ninjas appearing from every way in and out they could, descending on her and Superboy, Kid Flash and Artemis who were still in the hall.

Dick had vanished again.

Using a knife hidden in her belt, Talia cut herself free. She stood up and tucked her long and dark hair behind her ear.

"If my Beloved insists on sending children after me," she scowled, "so be it." Her hand flicked out in a signal to attack.

_[Incoming ninjas!]_ Kid Flash sent in distress to Aqualad and Miss Martian.


	4. 4 - I had to sex up some random

**Part 4 - "I had to sex up some random non-existent girl."**

* * *

Kid Flash tried to zip through the ninjas but their swords were swinging dangerously close to him. He pulled back close to Superboy and assisted the clone in disarming and knocking out those that came for them. Artemis had backed up and jumped onto one of the tables. She kicked a platter of... something out of the way as she fired off arrow after arrow.

Miss Martian announced her presence by forcing all the doors closed and then disarming every ninja she could, mostly those going after Superboy.

"They're all over the place!" Artemis shouted as another arrow hit air.

Superboy gave a shout of agreement as four ninjas dropped down onto him, holding his arms tight.

"She's getting away!" Kid Flash called out as he spotted Talia heading towards the window to the garden. A blade just missed his hand and he had to refocus on the ninjas surrounding him.

Aqualad smashed through the window with his water-bearers in the form of a mace and a sword.

"You will not escape," he informed her, blocking her exit.

Unfortunately, he didn't get a chance to prove himself. The crack of a whip sounded above the din of battle somehow, and made everyone pause.

"Whoa." Kid Flash

"Oh my-" Artemis' jaw went slack.

_[Who is that?]_ Miss Martian questioned, the sentiment echoed by Superboy.

Talia let out a huff and turned to face the woman in the dark wetsuit-like outfit, zipped partly down her front, cat-like headgear with goggles perched atop her head.

A whip rested in her hand as she tilted her head at Talia.

"Ruining this event just because your ex brought another lady to the party is tasteless," Catwoman said to Talia, holding her head tall.

Talia motioned for the ninjas to step back. Honour required that she fight this woman herself.

"I am not here for the foolish reason you think," she responded. "I am here for my Beloved."

"I am not stupid," Catwoman announced, walking down the stairway she had appeared in. "I know you're the one who threatened Bruce Wayne's life."

"Only if he refuses to come with me," Talia responded, drawing her sword.

As the two woman battled, a hidden figure pulled his phone back and whispered;

"You got all that?"

The stony silence on the other end was all the response he needed. Dick Grayson continued to watch from underneath the table.

He would have hidden in the chandelier but Talia's ninjas had gotten there first.

"I hope Catwoman wins," he muttered.

The person on the other end of the line heaved a sigh.

* * *

The team all silently agreed that these women were strong. Catwoman used a whip like it was an extension of her body, knocking Talia's arm out of the way and messing up her swings and kicks as she dashed and darted around her opponent.

Talia danced, her blade a weapon intent on reached its target. She sliced through the air, learning the way the whip moved and dodging every so often.

The team focused on the ninjas and were working their way through their numbers. It seemed it was a never-ending battle.

Superboy's ears caught the whisk of a cape on the ground. No footfalls, just the whisk. Then a flutter.

With a wiz, two batarangs intersected between the women's battle. Originally aimed at the hands holding the two weapons, they embedded in the wall as both women jumped back and out of their path.

"Batman," Talia greeted, a hit of pride and something else in her smooth voice. She knew he wouldn't be able to resist appearing.

"Here to spoil my night out?" Catwoman purred at the dark figure. "Although you're welcome to her while I help myself to the gems in this place."

The Team were surprised by the way these women addressed Batman. They didn't seem the least bit intimidated by the dark figure.

"A little help would be appreciated!" Kid Flash yelled at the figure in frustration.

"Fine," Batman huffed. A moment later, there was a haunting laugh. Smoke spewed out around the Team and the ninjas and a figure jumped out into the fray.

"I still can't believe you let a child run around fighting," Talia commented.

"I can't believe you called a hit on Bruce Wayne into the League," Batman responded. He would have crossed his arms over his chest but he needed to toss his bolas over to Catwoman, who was attempting to creep away. "And you promised you wouldn't hit this event."

Catwoman shrugged in a 'what can you do' way.

"I wasn't expecting a costume party," she responded.

"And I expected you to receive my message, not whomever did," Talia informed him.

_[She calls a threat a 'message'?]_ Artemis scoffed.

_[That's Talia for you,]_ Robin's light voice said as the smoke completely cleared. While his voice was light, he was busy fighting the last three ninjas. Two of them grabbed him by the arms while the third approached him with a sword.

_[Robin!]_ Miss Martian cried out, heading towards the boy wonder in fear.

Robin kicked out, his foot planting in the third ninja's face. He used it as leverage to kick himself up into the air, slipping out of the hold of the two other ninjas.

Aqualad knocked out one, Kid Flash tripped another and Miss Martian got the third.

"Nice of you to join us," Artemis said sharply but friendly.

Robin shrugged.

"This isn't really a 'heavy on the 'dis'' situation. Unfortunately, Superman failed to realise that."

"You have Catwoman, 'Talia' and a number of ninjas in the same room," Kid Flash pointed out, "how is this not a disaster?"

Robin pointed to Batman.

"Go home, Talia," Batman said. "I have no patience for any of yours or your father's schemes."

"You talk as if there's nothing between us," Talia said.

"Once, there might have been something. Now, there's nothing. Go home."

Talia flicked her hair out of her face.

"I understand, my Beloved," she responded, "however, I feel I should warn you. My father is up to something. He had allied himself with other people of power."

"I'll heed your warning. As long as you take the target off Bruce Wayne's back."

Talia left and none of the Team felt right stopping her; Robin stuck out an arm to block them in warning. The ninjas would be arrested but would probably vanish within the day.

"Hey~ Batman," Robin said lightly, "Catwoman's vanished."

* * *

When Batman dashed after Catwoman and Robin vanished, the Team shared looks before returning to their original task; finding Wayne and his son.

Aqualad found Wayne stumbling out of a room on the second floor, his tie once again undone and his manner lopsided.

"I had to sex up some random non-existent girl," he said nonchalantly when Aqualad questioned him on his disappearance and whereabouts.

"Are you aware of the whereabouts of your son?"

"You mean Dickie? Hey, do they have adoption where you're from?"

Aqualad gave him his most serious look, hoping that it was close to the looks Batman was known to give. It seemed to work.

"Dickie's probably outside, listening to the presentations. The fireworks should be about to start too."

_[Ohh, there's fireworks?]_ Miss Martian cooed when he relayed Wayne's words._ [Can we see?]_

_[Find Richard first,]_ Aqualad instructed.

"Oh there you are!" Selina giggled as she popped out of another room down the end of the hall. "I've been looking for you everywhere." She waltzed over, appearing to have more sense than Bruce, even if she slipped herself into his arms.

Bruce whispered something in her ear which made her giggle. Aqualad felt awkward but tried not to show it.

"Alright, let's go to the garden," Bruce said, "I'm sure the boring part is over."

* * *

Artemis found Dick in a tree of all places.

"What are you doing up there?" she demanded to know. He smirked at her, the same way he did that day he took the picture of himself and 'Artemis Crook' and jumped down.

Artemis wondered if his guardian would have a problem with the state of his clothes. They were crumbled and ruffled and he appeared to have misplaced his tie.

_[Found him,]_ she informed the Team. She decided she didn't really care what he looked like; Dick had messed up his clothes, he could deal with the consequences.

She wasn't his butler.

Aqualad decided on a rendezvous point and they headed over there.

"Dickie," Bruce sighed when he caught sight of his son, "where's your tie?"

"Um, I lost it?" Dick suggested, looking like a scolded but pleased, naughty child.

"We can't re-join the gala with you looking like that," Selina pointed out. At that moment, the fireworks started, blooming blasts of colour, fire and light.

"Wow!" Miss Martian cheered and clapped. Dick started explaining about how the fireworks were Wayne Enterprise's surprise for the night and the reason the presentations were moved outside.

Bruce snuggled up to Selina.

"Put it back," he whispered to her. She gave him her most innocent expression but didn't bother feigning ignorance.

"It's a souvenir," she pointed out, "for the trouble."

Bruce hummed an acknowledgement. He held a closed fist before her face and opened it just enough for her to spot a glitter from inside.

"I'll return it then," he said, "make up an excuse with the children for me."

Selina ducked away from him and crossed her arms. She couldn't be mad at him, this was the game she played.

"I'll tell them that the 'random non-existent girl' you 'sexed up' wants child support then," she responded as he ducked back inside the hall.


	5. 5 - Clark

**Notes: **So Brucie leaves us this chapter and we're left with Bruce. Dick also tones down the 'rich kid' act.

* * *

**Part 5 – "Clark." **

* * *

Alfred looked at his two charges. He knew what had likely occurred that night however, he still did not enjoy the sight of their crumbled suits and Master Dick's missing tie.

"Master Dick," Alfred commented in a disappointed tone.

"Sorry Alfred," Dick said, cowing under the attention from the man he saw as a grandfather. "I lost it."

"He was climbing trees again," Bruce pointed out.

"And what were you climbing, Master Bruce?" There was no irritation or annoyance in the tone, it was bland and British as usual.

"Women," Selina responded for Bruce, announcing her presence.

"Is that so?"

"Time for bed," Bruce suggested with a comic yawn and stretch. He went straight for the master bedroom, pulling Selina behind him.

The Team walked in, their spirits drained after the Gala. The ride back to the hotel hadn't been any better with Bruce constantly chatting about this and that, mostly women, and Dick's eyes on his phone as he played games and completely ignored them.

Alfred held his tray level with the Team, allowing them to choose if they wanted to drink the hot beverages he made for them.

"Oh!" Artemis sounded pleasantly surprised when she spotted the dark green mug with a light green arrow in it, just like her uniform.

"Awesome!" Kid Flash squealed, speeding forward and taking the yellow mug with red bolt on it. "Souvenir!" he announced with glee.

Miss Martian, Aqualad and Superboy cautiously stepped forward and took the corresponding mugs.

Miss Martian's was white with a red cross diagonally across it.

Aqualad's was black and red stripes and electric blue darting through the black segments.

Superboy's was black with a red 's' shield.

Superboy took a tentative sip even as Miss Martian lit up at the taste.

"Oh, this is amazing!" she breathed.

"You are too kind," Alfred said with a bow.

"Hey, where's mine?" Dick questioned in surprise.

"Go talk to Master Bruce if you want one," Alfred suggested. Dick raised his eyebrows but made his way to the master bedroom, taking care to knock before entering.

"You are devious, Alfie," Kid Flash commented. The drinks, hot chocolate, were served in the corresponding hero's identifying symbols and colours.

"From time to time, even Master Bruce needs a little hint," was the butler's answer.

Kid Flash took another sip of chocolaty goodness; he didn't think Batman would ever agree to give out his secret identity.

As if to spite him, Dick pounced out of the door and threw his hands into the air.

"He said 'YES'!" he cried out. The subdued, he added, "and Selina would like a cup too."

Dick did a cartwheel as Alfred went back into the kitchen as Bruce and Selina came back in. Bruce wasn't smiling which seemed strange to the Team but normal to the other occupants of the room.

"Hot chocolate?" Bruce questioned an eager tone to his voice.

"Yes, Master Bruce," Alfred said, coming back in with three new mugs on his tray.

A black mug with a yellow bat symbol, a black mug with a stylised 'R' and a navy mug with a cat on it.

"A Batman mug?" Superboy commented in confusion.

"A Robin fan? I should have known," Artemis scoffed at Dick. Dick smiled back at her and laughed.

A haunting and familiar laugh.

"Now you're just giving them our identities to them," Bruce scolded but there was amusement in it.

"You're Batman," Superboy stated blandly.

"And Robin!" Kid Flash added excitedly with a smile a mile wide. He whizzed over to Dick and wrapped an arm around the other boy's shoulders.

Dick pulled out a pair of sunglasses and placed them on his face.

"Forgive me if I'm wrong, but does this mean you are the Catwoman we saw earlier?" Aqualad requested to know from Selina.

"That's right," Selina responded with a purr. "Bruce informed me of what might be going down tonight when he asked me to be his date."

"Why are you telling us this now?" Miss Martian questioned.

"Simple. You figured it out," Bruce stated, "and I have my reasons." While he didn't trust them, it was obvious that Dick did. He was hoping that they wouldn't betray Dick by showing them the people behinds the masks.

With that said, he turned away and walked back into the master bedroom. Selina gave a fond sigh before following Alfred to the kitchen.

"You're Robin?" Artemis questioned in a sceptical tone.

"And Bruce is Batman," Dick responded.

"And you're just telling us this?" she questioned again, her voice rising a bit in pitch and still sceptical.

"Actually, I'm a little confused about that myself," Kid Flash added.

Dick smiled.

"Well, I am going to ask you to swear to secrecy," lower he added, "and sign non-disclosure agreements."

"Wait, what?" Artemis didn't like the sound of that.

"And most of your mentors already know who Batman is."

"Superman does," Superboy commented, "it's why he gave us this mission, right?"

"Right," Dick confirmed. "But, he did that without Batman's knowledge."

"So?"

Dick smiled mysteriously in response.

"Who wants to watch a movie?" Dick suggested.

* * *

Bruce came out of his bedroom the next morning to find Miss Martian in the kitchen, hovering over Alfred as he made pancakes. He took his coffee and stumbled back into the main room of the hotel suite.

Dick was pretending to sleep as Kid Flash snoozed over his legs. Superboy was watching static and looking bored but comfy while Aqualad was resting with his head on Kid Flash's chest. Artemis was standing behind the couch, going through stretches and any training she could while confined inside the hotel room.

"Where's Selina?" Dick questioned quietly, opening his eyes a crack.

"Still in bed," Bruce responded blearily, taking a sip of his warm wake-up juice. It always threw his body out when he managed to sleep more than six hours at once. "There'll be a visitor at nine. When he comes, let him in." Bruce tapped at the side of his eye, knowing that Dick would understand the signal.

"Got it," Dick responded.

Superboy gave them a suspicious look. Dick was more balanced than he had been the previous evening and more interactive with them. The rich kid act was diminished.

At two minutes past nine, the doorbell for the suite buzzed.

"Hi, Clark," Dick said, letting the large, bespectacled and klutzy man inside. Clark noticed the missing 'uncle' and Superboy's presence on the couch, right before bumping into the small round table by the door.

"Hi, Dick, omph," he grunted as the table dug into his hip. It didn't hurt but Clark made the reflexive sound habitually. "Where's Bruce?"

"Mr. Kent," Alfred greeted.

"Alfred."

"Hmm, not a fan of reporters," Selina purred.

Clark's eyes narrowed at her. He wasn't a fan of cat burglars. Especially cat burglars who dressed like cats and bothered bats.

"Clark." And there was the man himself. Bruce was standing next to Selina and while they weren't touching they were close enough that it showed they were an item.

"Bruce. Are we going to do this here?" Clark motioned to the teenagers all lounging around the suite and watching with intent and in some cases confused eyes.

"Hmm," Bruce mused.

"Of course!" Dick said, jumping up and wrapping his arms around Clark's shoulders and neck as he rested on the man's back.

Before Clark could properly react, Dick was gone. With his glasses.

"Dick!" he bellowed, chasing after the rogue acrobat. Dick flipped over the couch and hid behind Kid Flash. Superboy jumped up when Clark knocked the couch as he quickly moved around it.

"Don't touch him!" Superboy said, jumping between Dick and what he perceived to be a rampaging adult.

Clark pulled to a stop quickly.

"Uh," he stammered with his jaw hanging low. He looked over at Bruce who was smirking into his coffee; there would be no help from him. The sight sent a chill down Clark's spine and he had a moment where he wondered if it had been worth attracting the bat's wrath. "Dick, can I please have my glasses back?" he requested.

"Nope," Dick responded. "We'll laugh about this later."

"I'm not laughing," Artemis commented. She had noticed the similarities between this 'Clark Kent' and their Superboy.

She wasn't the only one. So had Aqualad and Miss Martian.

Kid Flash took a little longer. They all saw the realisation which dawned on his face as Clark scowled at them. He glanced between Superboy and Clark. Then to Dick who nodded.

"You're Superman!" he gasped in shock, complete with dramatic finger point.


	6. 6 - Lunch didn't agree with me?

**Notes: **This is the final chapter of Richness Protection and 'Brucie's' last excuse. As always, watch my space for other (and new) stories. Thank you to those who have left reviews! One of the reasons this story updates so often is because of all the love I know it's receiving (reviews = love). Feel free to leave a review and maybe state your favourite part of this story.

* * *

**Part 6 – "Lunch didn't agree with me?"**

* * *

The Team were hanging around the Master Bedroom door. Inside, Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne were talking.

"What are they saying?" Kid Flash asked Superboy. Superboy's face was scrunched up in concentration or confusion.

"Clark's saying something about how his identity is supposed to be secret and how he kept Mr. Wayne's identity a secret. Mr. Wayne's saying that Superman assigning us to protect him put his identity at risk and that he had everything under control and didn't need the boy scout interfering. Boy scout?"

"Bruce's nickname for Superman. Because his personality fits that of a stereotypical boy scout."

"Oh, I get it!" Miss Martian said.

"I don't," Superboy informed her.

"I can't believe they're Batman and Superman," Artemis said. "I mean, Bruce Wayne. Who saw that coming?"

"And Clark Kent," Kid Flash added, shaking his head. "I can't believe Superman spends his time like that."

"It is a good disguise," Aqualad added. Superman stood tall and strong while Clark slouched and mumbled.

"You know, Clark Kent came before Superman. He grew up on a farm in Kansas, after crash landing there as a baby," Dick explained to the bewildered team.

"A _farm?_ Kansas?" Artemis squeaked. It was the last place she would have expected _Superman _to come from. He's _Superman._ He's bulletproof and leaps tall buildings in single bounds. She couldn't even imagine him on a farm with animals and crops.

"They sound like the parent couple from M'gann's show. Or the grandparent couple."

Kid Flash and Dick shared looks and then started laughing.

"What's so funny?" Selina asked, from the couch where she was reclining.

"Superboy compared Bruce's and Clark's relationship to that of an old married couple!" Dick snickered.

"It's. So. True!" Kid Flash wheezed between breaths. "Even the Flash says so."

The door behind them opened to the impassive face of Bruce Wayne. Kid Flash jumped and zipped over behind Artemis who in turn scolded him for using her as a shield.

Dick turned to face Bruce with a smile. Selina privately thought that Bruce deserved this. She had suggested earlier that she do this talk elsewhere, where the team couldn't listen in like the nosey teenagers they are.

"Done yelling at each other yet?" Dick noticed that the team shifted closer to him, as if to protect him just in case Bruce does something. Dick wondered if he needed to tell them that they needn't bother.

"Clark and I are going to continue this talk elsewhere. It's going to involve creating a protocol for giving the team missions. Recent events have revealed weaknesses which need to be addressed.

"Dick, you are to stay in this room. The team will remain under the guise of providing protection after last night's events."

"Boo. That's boring," Kid Flash commented, ducking behind Artemis again as Bruce glared at him.

Dick nodded as Bruce moved past him.

"I guess I'd better get going to," Selina said, pecking Bruce on the check as she collected up her stuff. "Thanks for the crazy night. I'll see you back in Gotham."

Bruce grunted his consent and she swayed out of the room.

"I really hope you didn't sleep with her while the kids were staying over," Clark prattled on. Bruce forcefully shoved the Kryptonian out of the suite. "I mean, that's just-"

"Shut up, Clark," Bruce growled as he felt. "Alfred, watch them," he added before closing the door.

The click of a lock sounded.

"I liked him better last night. More fun," Artemis commented, to the shock of her teammates.

* * *

Bruce smiled at the waitress as she placed their orders in front of them and then bounced giddily off.

"Aren't you dating Selina?" Clark questioned as he picked up his fork, ready to devour the steaming apple pie before him.

The smile dropped of Bruce's face as he shifted from 'Brucie' to 'Bruce'.

"Last I checked, you didn't write for Gotham's gossip corner."

"It was just a question," Clark responded. Then he paused and tilted his head. "I think I hear a rock slide."

Bruce placed his fork back on the table and stood up.

"My suit's in the car. We'll talk on the way."

* * *

Dick typed away on his glove computer, glad that he could use it now that the team knew. He was bored. And he wasn't the only one. Kid Flash and Artemis had long stopped fighting with each other and were taking turns to declare how they were bored and how this was a waste of their time; guess who was saying what.

Aqualad had locked himself in the bathroom and Miss Martian was learning how to cook from Alfred. Alfred quietly insisted to Dick that he had taught worse. Like Bruce.

If Bruce could burn water after Alfred, Dick shuddered to think what he was like before.

"Master Bruce!" Alfred gasped in his scolding tone when he opened the suite door.

"Sorry, Alfred," Bruce said with a smile. "I lost the key."

"And a few other things, if I may say so."

"Sorry, Alfred, it's my fault," Clark said from beside him.

Bruce's pants were torn (he hadn't been paying attention when he pulled them back on) and his outfit rumpled (he really should have dried off better. And folded his clothes properly before rushing off as Batman). His hair was slightly damp (he wasn't going to explain that one). Alfred wondered if he needed to explain 'dry-clean only' to him. Again.

"Would you believe it, Alfred, if I said lunch didn't agree with me?"

"And there was an exploded pipe in the bathroom?" Clark added sombrely while the team held back snickers at Bruce's appearance.

* * *

Robin stretched and did a flip as he appeared in the cave. Batman had informed him that the team would be getting a mission that day, now that the process for assigning missions had been examined and the weaknesses addressed. Basically, Batman didn't want anyone else giving the team missions except Batman.

"Slow up," Artemis said, appearing a few moments after him. They had met after school and decided to head to the Zeta tube together.

"Nope," Robin responded, heading to where the rest of the team was. Parked in front of the TV.

"I don't think Mr. Wayne and Clark were in the bathroom," Superboy commented as they watched footage from the previous day.

Batman and Superman were clearing a rock slide which dropped right over train tracks and part of a track. They were working together to protect and free the people as well as clear the tracks. Batman threw small explosives at the rocks and Superman moved the ones which were too large to be moved by ordinary men. The video cut out just as part of the train exploded with what looked like water spraying everywhere. Batman was caught in the spray and drenched.

"At least they're not mad at each other," Robin commented as it was horrible when Superman and Batman were fighting. Nothing got done and he often ended up bearing the brunt of Batman's frustrations. Seeing the disappointed looks of his team members, after all, they had been cooped up in a room while Superman and Batman were out saving people, he decided to add;

"Well, I'm going to revive rumours online of Superman and Batman being together romantically. Who wants in?"

"Me!" Three eager voices responded. Aqualad didn't want in but he didn't say a word against it and Superboy just looked confused.

* * *

From a farm in Kanas, Clark Kent called Bruce Wayne and relayed what he had overhead the Team planning.

"I know," was the growled response. "You can get in their way if you want but I happen to know what Robin has planned if you do. It's not pretty." His tone screamed, 'you deserve it too, after what you pulled'. Dick hadn't asked for his identity to be put at risk either.

Clark decided he could deal with some internet rumours. And that he may need to take the team some apple pie before they leave on their next mission.


End file.
